Not ideal (Picture: ITV / Rex)
Saying ‘I love you’ for the first time is one of the more nerve-wracking parts of wading into seriously relationship territory.
Sure, it would be great if you and your paramour were on exactly the same page about what big emotional steps you want to take next, but unfortunately, we don’t live in a perfect world.
Sometimes you’ve got to deal with the fact that you’re in a place emotionally that your partner simply isn’t yet.
Whether you’ve spent days or maybe even weeks trying to sound out how best to say ‘I love you’ for the first time, or, like we saw with Liberty and Jake on last night’s episode of Love Island, it just slipped out, there’s always a chance that (horror of horrors) the recipient of our love doesn’t say it back.
Senior therapist Sally Baker tells Metro.co.uk: ‘Making any kind of declaration is a moment of great vulnerability.
‘Declaring one’s love for someone is a pivotal moment which comes heavy with the weight of expectation and usually with hope that the other person will reciprocate and immediately declare their love in return. Oh, if only life was so only tidy!’
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So what on earth do we do if our fears are realised and we don’t get an ‘I love you too’ in return?
While it may well feel catastrophic, Sally says this doesn’t have to be a disaster.
Ultimately, the key is trying not to make a big deal out of it.
Sally tells us you should simply ‘sit with the vulnerability of your declaration’, adding: ‘Hearing nothing back doesn’t mean it’s the end, as everyone progresses at their own rate.
‘Having someone you love not being ready to match your declaration is their [issue] not yours.’
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You’d also do well to remember that putting yourself out there is scary, and there are plenty of people who wouldn’t dare.
So if you’re planning on saying ‘I love you’ for the first time, say it with your chest and, no matter what response you get, own it, because you’ve done something really brave.
‘It takes courage to be honest and declare your love for someone,’ says Sally.
‘Declarations of love are always best delivered without any expectations or strings attached.
‘Own it. Say it and lean back, not in, and breathe.’
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Source:: Metro
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